The walls at American Dream are covered with pizza boxes on which many satisfied customers have drawn their favorite pizza-themed designs. The box Ben liked best had a dog jumping up to grab the pizza in his mouth like a frisbee. Unfortunately, such a world is possible only in the crayon-drawings of a child, for this pizza would never hold up for such use in the real world: with one flick of the wrist, the crust would go soaring far beyond the range of even the fastest dog, leaving a hot blob of cheese in its wake. The sheer weight of the cheese, in fact, would make it hard for anyone to throw this pie at all, besides maybe the delivery boys, who carry these massive pies every day, and whose muscles, consequently, rip right through their cut-off shorts.
It’s a seismic slice characterized by its constantly shifting crust and multiple layers of cheese; this is perhaps intentionally symbolic of the so-called American dream, considering all the art in the building and the owner’s apparent fondness for it. In America, you risk things to get ahead; you take chances. Taking a chance, coincidentally, is precisely how I’d describe the act of eating one of these slices. Holding it in your hand, watching the cheese melt down the side of the slice, effectively conquering the territory of the crust, you immediately get the sensation that perhaps this pizza is alive. You bite once, and the crust flakes off a little. You bite again and some cheese has escaped, joining parts of the crust on the plate. You get halfway through your slice, and it splits in half, and broken is your American Dream (slice of ‘za).
The sauce wasn’t bad, though, and it does seem as if these guys really want to make a good slice. You can tell there’s special attention paid to the crust, but they definitely need to make it stronger if it’s going to support all that cheese they load on it. We hypothesized that perhaps when making the pizza, all the ingredients shifted over to our side of the pizza, so we actually got like two slices in one. This makes sense in light of the America theme, since that means some other group of people got screwed at our expense.
They also (understandably) took a long time to get our slices out to us. We did get the two of diamonds, though, so that may have had something to do with it.
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